Goals Of The Bar/Bat Mitzvah Program

The goals are specific and realistic; yet, the implementation is flexible.

1. To help each student reach his or her full potential through the encouragement, guidance and support of the clergy, staff and teachers.

2. To enable each student to lead the congregation in prayer and read the ancient words and/or chant the ancient melodies from Torah and Haftarah.

3. To instill a thirst for Jewish knowledge through the study of Torah.

4. To encourage the practice of the mitzvot (commandments), Torah (the study of Torah), Avodah (worship) and Gemilut Chasadim (acts of loving-kindness.)

History Of Bar/Bat Mitzvah

Though the origins of the term Bar Mitzvah may go back thousands of years, the ceremony as we experience it today began to appear around the 14th century. It evolved into a joyous celebration during the 16th century. A boy aged 13 was considered a full member of the religious community and was given an aliyah (to go up) to the bimah (pulpit) and participated in the Torah service. It symbolized the youngster’s entry into responsible Jewish living in the community.

Starting in the 2nd or 3rd century, girls at the age of 12 had a legal responsibility to observe mitzvot. It was not until the 1800s that some families started celebrating the girl’s new status with festivity.

Bar/Bat Mitzvah – it a decisive milestone, not only a ceremony: the child reaches adolescence, physically and emotionally. At Temple the child must be, at least,13. There is no maximum age limit.

In the Jewish community, when the child becomes a Bar/Bat Mitzvah, thechild accepts additional responsibilities, most especially the full range of personal and spiritual accountability.

Torah: Study

The Pre-Requisites for Becoming Bar/Bat Mitzvah

1. Students must have attended and successfully completed religious school for a minimum of four years and must be attending the Temple Institute of Religion (TIR) or the Martin J. Gottlieb Solomon Schechter Day School during the year of Bar/Bat Mitzvah.

2. To be eligible to become a Bar/Bat Mitzvah, the student must satisfactorily meet the Temple’s standards of Hebrew learning. In order to meet these standards, students begin Hebrew instruction no later than the 3rd grade. A program of Reading Readiness is introduced to our 2nd grade TIR class to help our students reach Temple’s standard of Hebrew skill.

3. Students are expected to attend their classmates’ Bar/Bat Mitzvah ceremonies regardless of invitation to the celebration. Experience has shown the more services a student attends the more comfortable he/she will feel leading the service. Furthermore, Jewish worship needs to be experienced, not just taught. We encourage parents to join their children at these Bar/Bat Mitzvah ceremonies to set a positive example and make Shabbat worship a family experience. Attendance at a minimum of one Shabbat evening service per month is also expected.

4. A commitment to continue religious education is an expectation for all our Bar/Bat Mitzvah.

5. Families are expected to select and participate in a social action project for a minimum of 13 hours of community service during the course of the year.

6. Practice is the key to Bar/Bat Mitzvah preparation. Our experience has shown that the most successful students are those who practice a little bit every day rather than “cramming” immediately before their lessons.

7. Families are encouraged to light the Sabbath candles, to make Kiddush and recite Hamotzi in their homes on Friday night. We are happy to provide a sample home ceremony for the observance of Shabbat. We encourage you to incorporate these blessings on the Friday night of the Bar/Bat Mitzvah and at any luncheon or other meal after the Bar/Bat Mitzvah service.

8. Temple requirements, both educational and financial are expected to be met in order to progress with the celebration of your family’s simcha as scheduled.

9. The clergy, in cooperation with the Educational Staff, have the authority to implement the above requirements with flexibility, designing a program to meet the individual student’s needs.

Avodah: Worship

The Bar/Bat Mitzvah Ceremony

At Temple, the Bar/Bat Mitzvah symbolizes, in Jewish terms, the opportunity for the student to participate fully in the life of the congregation. This is celebrated by participation in the Friday evening and Shabbat morning services.

Each student is an individual of varying abilities and talents. The Bar/Bat Mitzvah student’s participation in the worship service may vary from reciting a few blessings to conducting virtually the entire service. The Clergy and Educational Staff will determine this during the private tutorials.

Each ceremony is special, as each student offers his or her own unique gifts.

Friday Evening Service

The Bar/Bat Mitzvah and his/her family lead the congregation in the lighting of the Shabbat candles and the Kiddush. Please be aware that during the Friday evening worship service there are often other simchas being celebrated, special events and, at times, creative worship experiences.

Shabbat Morning Service

The Bar/Bat Mitzvah leads the congregation in a portion of the morning worship. This may include the liturgy, Torah and Haftarah selections. The student also composes and delivers a D’var Torah (words about the Torah), teaching the congregation the meaning of his/her Torah portion.

Family Participation

There are many opportunities within the Shabbat morning service for family members and friends to participate. We call these honors.

· Presentation of Tallit: Families may choose to give their child a tallit (prayer shawl) at the opening of the Shabbat morning service. You may purchase a tallit or you may choose to honor a deceased relative by giving the child the tallit that belonged to that loved one. If the child is given a tallit during the Bar/Bat Mitzvah ceremony, the child is expected to wear it when attending future Shabbat morning services. This is not a gift “just for the Bar/Bat Mitzvah.” As such, if tallit wearing is part of your family observance, we welcome the tallit presenters to wear their own tallitot.

· Generational passing of the Torah Scroll

· Aliyot: Being called to the Torah to pronounce the blessing before and after a portion of Torah is read is known as an aliyah (pl. aliyot). Parents, grandparents, older siblings, aunts, uncles, may be honored with an aliyah to the Torah. Aliyah means “to go up.” At Temple, families may have up to three aliyot. Any number less or more than three is at the discretion of the Clergy. Families provide the complete Hebrew name of each person to be honored. Aliyot may be large groups spanning several generations.

Here at The Temple, we welcome the participation of non-Jewish family members from inter-faith families in large group aliyot containing Jewish family members.

· Parent’s Prayer: The parents’ prayer for the Bar/Bat Mitzvah follows the Haftarah. A prayer option is found on page 163 of Gates of Prayer for Shabbat and Weekdays. Some families have chosen to write their own prayer. The prayer should be personal, should contain Jewish content, and should be delivered in the form of a prayer (“We pray that you will.…”). Please be aware of the length of our Shabbat morning worship and keep your remarks within a reasonable length of time. The Clergy are happy to work with parents to prepare this prayer.

· Hagbah/Hagba’ah (Torah Holder): A family member or friend lifts the Torah and holds it while seated during the chanting of the Haftarah.

· G’li’lah/Golelet (dresser): A family member or friend dresses the Torah, and does not sit on the pulpit, but comes up to participate in this specific honor. This is a great honor for a younger family member or friend but can be anyone whom you wish to give an honor.

· Worship Pamphlet: The family may chose to prepare a worship pamphlet explaining the ceremony and honors to their guests. Examples are available in the Temple office. If the family chooses to prepare worship pamphlet, information regarding Shabbat morning worship will be provided to you and must be included. Worship pamphlets must be proofed by the Clergy for content no later than one week prior to the ceremony.

· If you have a large number of family members on whom to bestow honors, there are several other options that can be considered. Please discuss these with the Clergy.

PRAYER BOOK

The Gates of Prayer for Shabbat and Weekdays: A Gender Sensitive Prayer Book(gray book) is used for Shabbat morning services. On occasion, the New Union Prayer Book is used for Festival morning services.

Gemilut Chasadim: Acts of Loving Kindness

In keeping with the values of our faith, each Bar/Bat Mitzvah family is expected to engage in mitzvah projects that express our obligations as members of the Jewish community. We refer to these as tzedek projects.

On Shabbat morning, we read Eilu devarim:

“These are duties whose worth cannot be measured: Honoring one’s father and mother, acts of love and kindness, diligent pursuit of knowledge and wisdom,

hospitality to strangers, visiting the sick, celebration with bride and groom, consoling the bereaved, praying with sincerity, and making peace where there is strife,

And the study of Torah leads to them all.”

We encourage each Bar/Bat Mitzvah family to select that issue that is most meaningful to them. There are many local, national and international organizations you can support with your volunteer efforts. Each family is expected to complete a minimum of 13 hours of community service. A service record is provided at the end of this guide. Our Clergy and Education Staff are available to discuss your service project options.

Chain of Memory / Children of the Holocaust

The Chain of Memory project was established to link Bar/Bat Mitzvah children with one of the 1.5 million Jewish children who were murdered by the Nazis before being able to fulfill the mitzvah of learning Torah. You can dedicate your Bar/Bat Mitzvah ceremony to the memory of this child, thereby, symbolizing the importance of remembering the past while educating for the future. You will receive a certificate commemorating your participation in the program. To participate in the Chain of Memory project, contact the Midwest Regional office of the United States Holocaust Memorial Museum at (847)433-8099, or Chicago@USHMM.org. This information can also be obtained locally at the Jewish Foundation of Northeast Florida through their Children of the Holocaust Program. They can be reached at (904) 394-0720.

B’nei Tzedek

B’nei Tzedek is a project of the Jewish Foundation of Northeast Floridain cooperation with the Jacksonville Jewish Federation and the Gottlieb Family Philanthropic Fund. As a child becomes a Bar/Bat Mitzvah, the child begins to assume new responsibilities as a member of the Jewish community. One of those additional responsibilities is tzedakah (charity) or caring for the needy in the community. The B’nei Tzedek project is one opportunity to teach children how to make tzedakah decisions.

Children living in Northeast Florida are invited to establish a B’nei Tzedek Tzedek Fund in their own name with a minimum contribution of $125.00 to the Jewish Foundation of Northeast Florida. Checks should be made payable to “(Child’s Name) B’nei Tzedek Fund.” Your contribution will be matched by contributions of $125 from the Jewish Federation of Jacksonville and $250 from the Gottlieb Family Philanthropic Fund for a starting balance of $500. We encourage you and your child to add additional monies to the Fund at any time and in any amount and to ask friends and loved ones to contribute to the Fund to commemorate special occasions.

Every year for 20 years, all B’nei Tzedek participants will be able to recommend that a contribution be made to any Jewish charitable 501(c)(3) organization of their choice in the Northeast Florida area. The amount of the contribution will be 5% of the fund balance as of the anniversary of the Fund (minimum $25). The Fund will be professionally invested and managed with the Jacksonville Jewish Foundation’s other funds. There will be a 1% annual administrative fee.

After 20 years, the Fund will be converted to a permanent Endowment Fund of the Jewish Foundation of Northeast Florida in the name of the original B’nei Tzedek donor. It must meet the minimum balance required by the Jewish Foundation of Northeast Floridaand will be regulated by the then current bylaws of the Jewish Foundation of Northeast Florida. All questions and comments should be directed to the Executive Director of the Jewish Foundation of Northeast Florida at (904) 394-0720.

The Federation Joan Levin Gift of Israel Program

The Gift of Israel is a self selective program for children at their Bar/Bat Mitzvah. Launched in the fall of 1994 the program has helped over 125 teens experience Israel. The Joan Levin Gift of Israel program is designed to help subsidize organized trips to Israel for teens aged 16-22 years old. The program is funded by the Jewish Federation of Jacksonville annual campaign.

Enrollment is automatic and teens receive a voucher from Federation for the program. The voucher has a six year window to be redeemed for a matching fund to travel to Israel on a recognized program or Federation mission. The voucher is worth up to $700. The participants contact Federation about the use of the Gift of Israel voucher. Payment is made directly to the organization running the program, unless the trip has been paid in full and the family can show a statement from the program proving that there is no balance.

Students who go to college outside of Jacksonville are still able to use their voucher as long as their family remains in Jacksonville. We ask all teens returning from a trip to write an article for the Jacksonville Jewish News, talk with a youth group or board of directors, and/or speak at a synagogue about the program. For further information contact Joanne Cohen, assistant executive director of the Jacksonville Jewish Federation at (904)448-5000 ext. 205.

Temple Policies

And Other Helpful Information

The Temple staff is delighted to help you plan your upcoming Bar/Bat Mitzvah. Understanding the policies in advance and adhering to them will make everything run more smoothly. Close communication with the Executive Director is essential.

The word “family” refers to the parents or responsible parties of Bar/Bat Mitzvah candidates.

1. To confirm a Bar/Bat Mitzvah date, the family must be members in good standing. All dues, fees and assessments are due and payable 60 days before the ceremony.

2. Application for use of the Temple facilities for your celebration must be made with the Executive Director.

As the Temple calendar can become very busy, we encourage you to meet with the Executive Director six months before the event. Many important aspects of the weekend simcha will be discussed such as: invitations, handouts, time lines, entertainment, rental fees, caterers, florists and photographers, dishes, flatware and glasses. Discussing these items in advance can help to answer many questions which may arise.

3. When Temple is the site of any portion ofyour celebration, all caterers, orchestras and florists are required to provide Certificates of Insurance covering Workmen's Compensation, Bodily Injury and Property Damage Liability Insurance. Caterers are also required to supply Food and Products Liability Insurance and a Health Department number. Caterers must abide by Temple's policies and procedures. While we do not endorse specific vendors we encourage families to support vendors who support Temple by advertising in our yearbook.

4. Temple custodial staff must be present at all functions. Custodial staff will be the first to arrive and the last to leave the Temple. Custodial staff does not assist with the serving of food or drink, or bus tables. Their function is to arrange the Temple's tables and chairs and to oversee the operation of the dishwasher. Setting up rental equipment is the responsibility of the caterer.

5. We encourage the Bar/Bat Mitzvah family to sponsor the Oneg Shabbat which is held after services on Friday evening. You may choose to ask Temple Sisterhood or a private caterer to prepare the Oneg.

6. On Shabbat morning, the family is expected to provide the challah and wine for the entire congregation to enjoy.

7. We encourage families to provide a simple Kiddush luncheon to which the entire congregation is invited following the Shabbat morning service.

8. No pork products or shellfish may be served at the Temple. In addition, no meat and dairy products may be served on the same platter or dish.

9. Payment of 50% room rental fees secures the room reservation. Balance of all fees is due 60 days before the scheduled event.

10. A silk floral arrangement for the bimah is available at no charge. Some families choose to have fresh flowers, a FANN basket or another bimah arrangement based on the family service project.

11. ABSOLUTELY NO PHOTOGRAPHS may be taken at any time during the services. It is the responsibility of the PARENTS of the Bar/Bat Mitzvah student to inform family members and the photographer of the Temple policy.

Families may schedule photos before services on Friday evening or Saturday morning. The Clergy are available for photographs on Saturday mornings prior to the service.

12. If you wish to have the service recorded arrangements can be made with the Temple Brotherhood to do so.

13. We ask the Bar/Bat Mitzvah family to ask two family members or friends to serve as ushers for the Friday evening service and Shabbat morning service.

14. Only Temple Clergy, or their designates, may officiate at religious ceremonies.

15. It is customary to invite the Clergy and their families, the president of the Congregation, the Bar/Bat Mitzvah student's teachers and the entire class to the ceremony.

16. Sisterhood's Judaica shop, Judaica Treasures is available to supply gifts and special orders for the occasion. Some families choose to provide kippot (skull caps). This is optional as Temple custom does not require wearing a kippah.

17. The family has the opportunity to ask a member of the Board of Trustees with whom they have a relationship to present gifts to the Bar/Bat Mitzvah on behalf of Temple, Brotherhood and Sisterhood. These include a certificate commemorating the event, a Torah commentary, a kiddush cup or candlesticks and mezuzah, NFTY in Israel and Joan Levin Gift of Israel certificates. We are happy to assist you with a Board presenter if you do not have a preference.

18. The honors sheet contains information crucial to the weekend. Please return the sheet no later than four weeks prior to your celebration.

Bar/Bat MitzvahTime-Line

1. Ten months to one year before the Bar/Bat Mitzvah date: Intake meeting with the Clergy. The family meets with the Rabbi to review the Torah portion and Haftarah. The child selects those portions he/she wishes to learn. Weekly tutorials with the Bar/Bat Mitzvah tutor begin immediately following this meeting. The tutor will assess the child’s mastery of the prayers and blessings. We may recommend additional tutoring for the student to reach the appropriate level of preparedness.

2. Three months prior: Arrange for oneg at Temple.

3. Two to three months prior to the ceremony: Child meets with Rabbi to discuss D’var Torah; parents meet with Rabbi to plan parents’ prayer.

4. Four weeks before ceremony: Submit completed honors form. First sanctuary rehearsal with a Bar/Bat Mitzvah tutor.

5. Three weeks before ceremony: Second sanctuary rehearsal with a Bar/Bat Mitzvah tutor.

6. Two weeks before ceremony: Third sanctuary rehearsal with a Bar/Bat Mitzvah tutor.

7. One week before ceremony provide worship pamphlet to clergy for proofing.

8. Three to four days before ceremony: Final sanctuary rehearsal with the Clergy and family members.

Bar/Bat Mitzvah!